All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).

217_add.wav(92K) 217_add.mp3(92K)

Cartman: "He has ADD, Attention Defecit Disorder... that's why he's so jittery all the time."

217_allsfair.wav(48K) 217_allsfair.mp3(48K)

Cartman: "Hey, all's fair in love and war... and coffee."

217_anotherway.wav(86K) 217_anotherway.mp3(86K)

Mr. Garrison: "...and if it doesn't kick ass, and you make me look bad, Mr. Hat is going to smack you bitches up!"

217_aprice.wav(56K) 217_aprice.mp3(56K)

Cartman: "Well we can explain that to you easily, you know for a price."

217_argument.wav(140K) 217_argument.mp3(140K)

Cartman: "This guy sucks ass!"

217_assignment.wav(61K) 217_assignment.mp3(61K)

Mr. Garrison: "Come up with something current in South Park to do a report on."

217_bigbusiness.wav(45K) 217_bigbusiness.mp3(45K)

Cartman: "Stealing underpants... BIG business!"

217_blood.wav(86K) 217_blood.mp3(86K)

Cartman: "They took my underpants again... Soon they'll want my blood!   Bloood!"

217_bug.wav(60K) 217_bug.mp3(60K)

Cartman: "Holy bleep, we killed your friend!"

217_butthurts.wav(6K) 217_butthurts.mp3(6K)

Stan: "My butt hurts."

217_cameljoe.wav(123K) 217_cameljoe.mp3(123K)

Cartman: "Hey kids, I'm Camel Joe, and I love a fresh cup of coffee!"

217_cartmansass.wav(30K) 217_cartmansass.mp3(30K)

Kyle: "Its almost as big as Cartman's ass!"

217_corporations.wav(225K) 217_corporations.mp3(225K)

Cartman: "The kids discuss corporations, as grand theft BVD is occuring to Tweek."

217_countryfresh.wav(29K) 217_countryfresh.mp3(29K)

Cartman: "Country fresh... like the morning, after a rainstorm..."

217_crazy.wav(55K) 217_crazy.mp3(55K)

Mayor McDaniels: "Well I must say Garrison, perhaps you're not as stupid and crazy as I always tell people you are."

217_diarrhea.wav(24K) 217_diarrhea.mp3(24K)

Cartman: "Your coffee takes like 3 day old moldy diarrhea."

217_dickhole.wav(64K) 217_dickhole.mp3(64K)

Mr. Garrison: "Well, I don't want to sound like a dickhole, but I told you so."

217_everett.wav(109K) 217_everett.mp3(109K)

Mr. Garrison: "...he thought, who is this woman with her gazungas and high heels..."

217_fatsmelly.wav(82K) 217_fatsmelly.mp3(82K)

Cartman: "On my right, a big fat smelly corporate guy from New York..."

217_finalspeech.wav(239K) 217_finalspeech.mp3(239K)

Cartman: "The kids give the final version of their speech."

217_fiveoclock.wav(80K) 217_fiveoclock.mp3(80K)

Cartman: "At 5 o'clock, the best coffee wins.. either your coffee, or a fresh warm cup of Tweek's coffee."

217_gnomesong.wav(127K) 217_gnomesong.mp3(127K)

Cartman: ""We won't stop until we have underpants...""

217_gotintoit.wav(43K) 217_gotintoit.mp3(43K)

Kyle: "I think it went really good, people really got into it."

217_greatjob.wav(38K) 217_greatjob.mp3(38K)

Mr. Garrison: "Well boys, its obvious that you didn't even..."

217_group1.wav(30K) 217_group1.mp3(30K)

Mr. Garrison: "Wendy, Bebe, Clyde, Pip, and Token, you be group one."

217_group2.wav(81K) 217_group2.mp3(81K)

Mr. Garrison: "Group 2 will be Stan, Kyle, Eric, Kenny and... and... Tweek."

217_hellwithyou.wav(96K) 217_hellwithyou.mp3(96K)

Cartman: "Awwww, the hell with yout!"

217_hitstuff.wav(73K) 217_hitstuff.mp3(73K)

Kyle: "Cartman?  Why do you always have to hit stuff with a stick?"

217_hooray.wav(12K) 217_hooray.mp3(12K)

Kyle: "Uhhhh, hooray!"

217_horrible.wav(111K) 217_horrible.mp3(111K)

Mr. Garrison: "Oh, no, not that Mr. Hat... that's horrible... anyway, good luck passing your new law, boys."

217_ineedcoffee.wav(32K) 217_ineedcoffee.mp3(32K)

Cartman: "Tweek tells his dad how he feels about things..."

217_insane.wav(114K) 217_insane.mp3(114K)

Cartman: "Oh, maybe, maybe its all in my head.  Maybe I'm going insane.   I'm going insane."

217_itsfresh.wav(55K) 217_itsfresh.mp3(55K)

Cartman: "Oh, you'll like this coffee... its fresh!"

217_jesus.wav(21K) 217_jesus.mp3(21K)

Cartman: "Oh, jesus, jesus man, jesus!  What are we going to do, huh?"

217_johnpostem.wav(192K) 217_johnpostem.mp3(192K)

Cartman: "John Postem, from Harbucks Coffee, tells Mr. Tweek about the generous offer."

217_juicemaker.wav(18K) 217_juicemaker.mp3(18K)

Cartman: "They really have my balls in a juicemaker."

217_justgreat.wav(24K) 217_justgreat.mp3(24K)

Stan: "Well, this is just great.  We haven't gotten anything done, and we're totally screwed."

217_killedkenny.wav(47K) 217_killedkenny.mp3(47K)

Cartman: "Jesus bleep... look out!"

217_liketoto.wav(54K) 217_liketoto.mp3(54K)

Mayor McDaniels: "We'll get a band that everybody likes... likes, uh, uh, like Toto."

217_losethem.wav(77K) 217_losethem.mp3(77K)

Cartman: "Your underpants are missing because you lose them, not because of underpants gnomes."

217_loveyouguys.wav(41K) 217_loveyouguys.mp3(41K)

Cartman: "I love you guys."

217_machine.wav(76K) 217_machine.mp3(76K)

Cartman: "These boys should learn how the corporate machine is ruining America."

217_metaphors.wav(152K) 217_metaphors.mp3(152K)

Cartman: "...that smooth aroma and mild taste are what makes Tweek coffee special..."

217_mild.wav(111K) 217_mild.mp3(111K)

Cartman: "Its suttle, and mild, mild like the first flash of sun on an April morning."

217_neitherdidwe.wav(39K) 217_neitherdidwe.mp3(39K)

Cartman: "Boys, you have really opened our eyes, we didn't even know this was happening."

217_nohar...wav(112K) 217_nohar...mp3(112K)

Cartman: "Thank you Mr. Postem, but I think we'll be fine with the money from selling our son into slavery."

217_nomorecoffee.wav(52K) 217_nomorecoffee.mp3(52K)

Cartman: "No... more... coffeee (BARF)"

217_nowayman.wav(31K) 217_nowayman.mp3(31K)

Cartman: "No way man, that's way too much pressure!"

217_offer.wav(108K) 217_offer.mp3(108K)

Cartman: "...alright then, how about five hundred thousand dollars?"

217_oursecret.wav(218K) 217_oursecret.mp3(218K)

Cartman: "The underpants gnomes steal underwear as Mr. Tweek talks."

217_pecker.wav(21K) 217_pecker.mp3(21K)

Cartman: "I hope we're not wasting our time with this little pecker."

217_phase1.wav(75K) 217_phase1.mp3(75K)

Cartman: "Collecting underpants is just phase one!"

217_phase2.wav(163K) 217_phase2.mp3(163K)

Cartman: "Phase 1... collect underpants... phase 2...??? ... Phase 3 - PROFIT!"

217_prop10ad.wav(382K) 217_prop10ad.mp3(382K)

Cartman: "What do children have to say about prop 10?"

217_proveit.wav(139K) 217_proveit.mp3(139K)

Cartman: "Sleep at my house tonight, I'll prove it to you!"

217_pussy.wav(55K) 217_pussy.mp3(55K)

Cartman: "Hey, he called me a pussy.  I'm not a pussy, you're a pussy."

217_pussygnome.wav(30K) 217_pussygnome.mp3(30K)

Cartman: "Little pussy gnome, don't call me a pussy.  Pussy gnome."

217_rawsewage.wav(66K) 217_rawsewage.mp3(66K)

: " Yeah, it doesn't have that bland raw sewage taste that Tweek's coffee has."

217_raymond.wav(52K) 217_raymond.mp3(52K)

Cartman: "How about we do it on the guy on TV, Raymond.  Everybody loves Raymond."

217_robreiner.wav(21K) 217_robreiner.mp3(21K)

Cartman: "We're as low and dispicable as Rob Reiner."

217_sadnews.wav(142K) 217_sadnews.mp3(142K)

Mr. Garrison: "There is a possibility that I will be let go and will never be allowed to teach you again."

217_saladshooter.wav(20K) 217_saladshooter.mp3(20K)

Cartman: "They really have my balls in a salad shooter."

217_salespitch.wav(157K) 217_salespitch.mp3(157K)

Cartman: "Mr. Postem does his Camel Joe coffee pitch."

217_sanchez.wav(28K) 217_sanchez.mp3(28K)

Cartman: "Quit being so melodramatic, Sanchez... Jesus bleep!"

217_screwedus.wav(39K) 217_screwedus.mp3(39K)

Cartman: "Jesus dude, I'm the one to blame for all of this.  I'm to blame for everything!"

217_seethem.wav(59K) 217_seethem.mp3(59K)

Cartman: "Next is issue 37-D... Missing underpants."

217_slavery.wav(100K) 217_slavery.mp3(100K)

Cartman: "Which means, I might have to shut down and sell my son Tweek into slavery."

217_strongbitter.wav(30K) 217_strongbitter.mp3(30K)

Kyle: "Man, this stuff is strong... Its kinda bitter."

217_stupidreport.wav(84K) 217_stupidreport.mp3(84K)

Stan: "We have to do this stupid report so.... so... lets figure out what to do it about."

217_thatsgood.wav(69K) 217_thatsgood.mp3(69K)

Kyle: "We're his oral report buddies."

217_thereport.wav(137K) 217_thereport.mp3(137K)

Stan: "Perhaps there is no stopping the corporate machine... and that's our report... I guess."

217_theusual.wav(89K) 217_theusual.mp3(89K)

Officer Barbrady: "(Meow... SLAP) Thanks, see you tomorrow."

217_thissucks.wav(15K) 217_thissucks.mp3(15K)

Cartman: "Oh man, this sucks!"

217_toomu...wav(11K) 217_toomu...mp3(11K)

Cartman: "Arrgh, too much pressure!"

217_toto.wav(74K) 217_toto.mp3(74K)

Mayor McDaniels: "Toto ladies and gentlemen!"

217_turds.wav(58K) 217_turds.mp3(58K)

Mr. Garrison: "You little turds!  You ruined my life for the last time!"

217_tweekcoffee.wav(160K) 217_tweekcoffee.mp3(160K)

Cartman: "We may not call it fancy names... I guess we just care a little more."

217_under...wav(93K) 217_under...mp3(93K)

Cartman: "The little guys who come into your room late at night and steal your underpants..."

217_vicegrip.wav(22K) 217_vicegrip.mp3(22K)

Cartman: "They really have my balls in a vicegrip."

217_village.wav(34K) 217_village.mp3(34K)

Cartman: "Oh, are you taking us to your little pussy house?"

217_welfare.wav(144K) 217_welfare.mp3(144K)

Cartman: "Look at Kenny's family, they're perfectly happy being poor and on welfare, right Kenny?"

217_whoopee.wav(235K) 217_whoopee.mp3(235K)

Cartman: "The kids have a caffeine rush."

217_whore.wav(37K) 217_whore.mp3(37K)

Cartman: "You hear that?  You're not going to get away with that you whore!"

217_workw...wav(64K) 217_workw...mp3(64K)

Mr. Garrison: "There's nothing wrong with Tweek, I'm sure he'll do a great job in your group."