Bulletproof price at: amazon
All wavs on this page were sampled at (8 bit mono 11Khz) and all mp3s on this page were sampled at (80kbs 44Khz).
BLEEP_2_do.wav(34K) BLEEP_2_do.mp3(34K) BLEEP_2_do.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Archie Moses (Adam Sandler): "You're gonna bleepin' kill me man... I got bleep to do tomorrow."
didneyland.wav(14K) didneyland.mp3(14K) didneyland.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
disneyland.wav(195K) disneyland.mp3(195K) disneyland.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Jack Keats (Damon Wayans): "This is my retarded friend. He's from Arkansas somewhere and uh he wants to go to Disney Land... Why do you want to go to Disney Land man?"
Keats: "You see it's Disney Land he wants... Where? I love the way he says Disney Land... Say that again."
stepback.wav(54K) stepback.mp3(54K) stepback.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "So why don't you STEP THE FUCK BACK before I bitch slap your bleepin' hiney."
tasteout.wav(62K) tasteout.mp3(62K) tasteout.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "You see that he's licking me he loves me."
Keats: "No, he just licked his balls and now he's trying to get that nasty taste out of his mouth."
bullfighter.wav(82K) bullfighter.mp3(82K) bullfighter.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cop: "Where are you headed sir?"
Moses: "I'm going to Mexico... I'm gonna start my life over... I'm gonna be a bullfighter."
drinking.wav(84K) drinking.mp3(84K) drinking.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Cop: "Have you been drinking sir?"
Moses: "I had about a half a beer, but the dog had a lot."
chewloud.wav(63K) chewloud.mp3(63K) chewloud.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "How about if I chew loud... Sometimes when I eat, I chew loud... yum yum yum yum... you gonna shoot me?"
your_god.wav(138K) your_god.mp3(138K) your_god.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Man that was Gods' way of telling you to let me go I think."
Keats: "Yeh, We must serve different gods because mine is saying to shoot you and throw you over that cliff."
Moses: "Well, I don't like your god... Your god scares me."
piss_on_u.wav(290K) piss_on_u.mp3(290K) piss_on_u.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "That was a big mistake making me piss my pants like that man... Because it's payback time... I don't know when... I got a good feeling it's when your sleeping... And I know you're gonna sleep soon enough... And then guess what... I'm gonna piss all over you... See that's worse... It's my piss on me right now... You can deal with it when it's your own piss... but you're gonna have my piss on you... And that... That's gross."
porno.wav(20K) porno.mp3(20K) porno.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Hey alright, they got porno."
likeporn.wav(118K) likeporn.mp3(118K) likeporn.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "I saw the sign man. You guys got a lot of porno here."
Charles the Innkeeper (Mark Roberts): "Yes, we have an excellent selection."
Moses: "Great, I like the porn."
Charles: "Well... Good."
wack_off.wav(72K) wack_off.mp3(72K) wack_off.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Being up in the sticks man you must loose your mind around here... nothing else to do... You wack off a lot?"
Charles: "What's a lot?"
threesome.wav(169K) threesome.mp3(169K) threesome.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Is that your wife back there?"
Moses: "bleep damn she's hot!"
Charles: "Thank you."
Moses: "Yeh, The three of us... We could burn it up together don't you think."
Charles: "What do you mean?"
Moses: "You know damn well what I mean."
sandwiches.wav(188K) sandwiches.mp3(188K) sandwiches.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "So uh, what do you think? Me... You... The old lady... a little sandwich action."
Charles: "What... What do you mean?"
Moses: "Yeh come on, You're a peice of white bread... She's a peice of white bread... I'm a salomi. Let's give it a shot?"
Charles: "Well she's not eating sandwiches, she's on a diet right now."
Moses: "Alright, Well think about it."
weed.wav(41K) weed.mp3(41K) weed.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Hey man what are you doing? You just wasted good weed!"
gun.wav(114K) gun.mp3(114K) gun.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Keats: "(Moses tries to escape through the window while taking a shower. Keats stops him by sticking his gun moses' butt.) Let me guess, just dropped the soap."
Moses: "Please get that out of my ass."
Keats: "I want you on the bed now! (charles the innkeeper walks by and mistakes this for something else... I think you get the picture.)"
Moses: "Hey Charlie."
Keats: "What's up Chuck?"
mom_weed.wav(65K) mom_weed.mp3(65K) mom_weed.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Could you do me a favor... Could you check in on my mom every once and a while and make sure she not smokin' too much weed."
greyarea.wav(56K) greyarea.mp3(56K) greyarea.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Will you get over that black and white bleep and come over to the grey area already... bleep damnit there's plenty of room!"
pathetic.wav(38K) pathetic.mp3(38K) pathetic.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Jeeze, I got to learn how to fight... This is pathetic."
girlfriend.wav(38K) girlfriend.mp3(38K) girlfriend.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "Keats your girlfriend is shooting at me... What do you want me to do, tell her she's pretty?"
bullet.wav(104K) bullet.mp3(104K) bullet.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Keats: "Man, it's just a little flesh wound."
Moses: "A bullet hit my back... It hurts!"
Keats: "Try taking one in the head."
Moses: "Alright, yeh, that probably hurt more."
bullfighter2.wav(26K) bullfighter2.mp3(26K) bullfighter2.m4r(iPhone ringtone)
Moses: "bleep that bleep man... I'm gonn be a bull fighter."